Give people their flowers while they are still alive, while they can still smell them. This saying is great to reflect on and ask yourself if you are honoring your loved ones now while they are living.
A great quote from Anne Frank says, “Dead people receive more flowers than the living ones because regret is stronger than gratitude.” There is a lot of insight in that quote. It can be easy to take for granted the people we have in our lives. Thinking they will always be there but the truth is that we don’t know the future.
For some of us we have that tugging in our soul compelling us to tell someone how we feel, to spend more time, to reach out and mend fences. Unfortunately procrastination, fear and shame can keep us from honoring and showing love to those who are close to our hearts.
What does it really mean to give people their flowers?
Give people their flowers while they are still alive. What does that really mean? Essentially it means if you think about how much they mean to you tell them. Actually send them flowers, learn what their love language is and shower them in love.
Think of that person who means the most to you or maybe it is someone you need to mend fences with. If you were to wake up and they were gone what would your regrets be? Would you believe that they felt loved, honored and known by you in life. I can imagine that there is no more satisfying way to pass on when it is your time having known and felt fully honored and loved in life.
You never want to have those “flowers” in your pocket but never have handed them to your loved one. Think of the people who you want to thank for the impact they have had on your life. Who has shown you love or poured into your life. Who made you feel loved like others haven’t? Once you know who they are you can brainstorm how you can honor them now.
3 Steps to Give People their Flowers
1. Learn their love language.
Once you know how they feel loved, go out and honor them. Love them in their language and let it be known that they had an impact on you.
2. Make it a habit and a lifestyle to connect with those important to you.
Getting someone flowers or buying them dinner once is great. Creating a lifestyle of showing and giving love will not only honor your loved ones it will be a legacy you can create for yourself.
3. Push past fear and shame and share your heart.
We all communicate differently. Some of us are very open and vulnerable with our family and loved ones. Saying I love you, hugs and gifts are second nature for some. That is not reality for everyone. Sometimes we don’t know what to say. We don’t know how to initiate intimacy with loved ones where that is not the norm. We may want to show them how much we care but are fearful.
There may be a lot more that goes into why and how being vulnerable is a struggle and you can find support for that. Do everything in your power to push past the fear and give people their flowers while they are still alive, when they can still smell them.